Such a trying week here in the Attic. Despite the odd few hours of happy Playtime that I've been telling you about, pretty much everything else has been an uphill struggle. The weather hasn't helped, bleugh, it's been gross. So wet. So grey. So blustery. So yuckety-yuck. My big pushchair has a puncture in the back tyre which I'm waiting for J to mend, so I've been struggling with the small fold-up buggy. Its small wheels are not cut out for the rough, bumpy terrain of our canal-side school run, or an old town composed of many bumpy, cobbled streets. It's been remarkably hard, physically speaking, simply getting to where I need to be. The rain cover on the small buggy is also very inadequate and keeps flapping off. Plus Little B hates being under it, he cries and tries to kick it off. He's also started this really annoying habit of kicking his own shoes off as I'm walking along, so I've been forever stopping (in the wind and the rain), giving him a telling off and putting his shoe on again. It's taken some doing to remain calm, well in fact yesterday I did not remain calm at all and flew into a verbal tiz, shocking many innocent passers-by. Not to mention the poor Little People who are not accustomed to their Mummy yelling in public. Breathe Deeply. Inhale. Exhale. Try to stay calm.
We're heading into some changes to our routine too, which hasn't helped the stress levels this week. The above artwork was made by Little B, it's a painting of the sunshine. It was his first ever painting made at the sweet local Playgroup where he's started 2-hour sessions on a Wednesday and Friday. It's a lovely setting in an old church hall, run by very warm, kind playgroup ladies. It's almost identical to the sort of playgroup I remember vaguely from my own early childhood. There's something about church-hall playgroups, the smell of them, the sweet modesty of the activities, that remains so constant over the years. A reading corner with piles of cushions and a fold out library of books. Sand to dig in. Painting easels and play-doh tables. Role play activities (a café setting this week), and a weeny trampoline to bounce on. A break for snack time, then some physical activities (bike riding and ball games this week). Then story time and singing. I love it very much.
It turns out that Little B doesn't much like being separated from his Mummy though. He chooses to cry and shout NO no No nO No NO NO NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It has been hard. But I'm told that once I'm gone, he soon calms down and begins to ease into the fun of the morning. It'll take some time but I know he's going to eventually love going there. Eventually. For now I Breathe Deeply. Inhale. Exhale. Try to stay calm.
I left the church hall in a bit of a fluster this morning, I felt quite tattered actually. I felt physically tired and emotionally strung out. So I did the first thing that came into my head. I walked to the nearest food shop (Marks and Spencer), purchased a danish pastry, marched home, made myself a coffee and went outside with it. It wasn't too cold, so I fetched an old cushion and sat at my damp table, drinking coffee, nibbling my pastry and Breathing Deeply. Inhale. Exhale. It felt good.
I looked around my poor neglected little back yard, with it's sad pots full of soggy dead things. Inhale. Exhale.
And I looked up to the sky and noticed that the rain clouds were finally beginning to clear. I was really delighted to see some blue up there, it lifted my spirits enormously. Spring will be peeking in soon, not long now. I think I might splash out some cash and buy some spring flowers to plant into my pots. Yes, it's a plan.
Incidentally, when I went to collect Little B from playgroup this morning, it was great. He was sat waiting for me, full of happy smiles, and the playgroup ladies said he'd had a lovely time. I felt overjoyed to hear of his happy playtime in my absence, and overjoyed to gather him up in my arms for a big cuddle. We stopped off at the market on our way home to buy some flowers. Always fresh flowers on a Friday. The plant man's stall looked incredible today, I wish I'd had my camera with me. There were many, many buckets of abundant spring lovliness! I deliberated for a while over what to get, I was very taken with the glorious tulips (the most amazing orange ones sang out to me) and the bunches of tight blue hyacinths. Oh and of course the daffodils, oh the daffodils looked amazing.
I gave in to the daffodils (2 bunches for £1.50) but then on an indulgent impulse I also plucked out a bunch of the most stunning anemones (£3.50).
Oh, and eh-hem, yes, well, a little extra something also came home with me today. Isn't this little milk jug lovely? It made my heart flutter when I spotted it in a shop window on Monday, and today it made my heart flip clean over when it became mine.
Oh these flowers. Oh. Such beauty! I'm Breathing that beauty in, inhale-exhale. Delicious.
They really have cheered me and lifted my flagging spirit today.
J isn't well at the moment either, and it's added to the stress of the week for sure. He's never ill. He has a hugely strong constitution, a hardy Yorkshire immune system and it's been many, many years since I've seen him so poorly. He's spent the past two days in bed with a very nasty head cold and fever. Poor man, he really has been knocked off his feet. So I've been fussing over him, keeping him supplied with food, drinks and pills (I even made homemade soup and I NEVER do homemade soup remember, so he is very honoured), and trying desperately to keep the house reasonably peaceful so he can sleep. Trying to keep three Little People quiet is very very hard and very very draining, especially in the bustle of our getting-ready-for-school routine. It's been a complete nightmare actually.
Ahhhhhhhh. Breathe Deeply. It'll pass. It. Will. Pass.
Just look at Little B. He sleeps surprisingly well squished into the small buggy on the way home from town, all tucked up under his blanket. But when he woke up he declared he was cold. He took himself to the sofa, got himself all tucked up in the ripple and waited patiently for me to provide Postman Pat entertainment. So sweet. Growing so fast. Two years old and going to Playgroup, crikey. We are fully into Toddlerdom now, no more baby-days.
Well......8.30pm and I am heading to bed with a cup of tea and a magazine to read. There's no place I would rather be.
Wishing you a weekend full of Happy Things, I'm wishing the same for myself. Yes, Happy Things would be good. ♥